So I think I finally get it. There is no need for me to remain tuned to their frequency just in case people who have rejected me might at some future date change their mind. I need to free up the channel for something else. so ended up dropping a few minor connections that i made unconsciously hoping for someone to come back to me.
Not that I’m not open but I think that I end up in this space of feeling hurt that I don’t acknowledge but feed anyway. Wasting my energy thinking that someone would not reject me if they really thought about it. And wasting my time wondering if I’m a good person because someone rejected me. I am a good person before and after rejections.
A person rejected me. It’s their process not mine. I needed to let it go.